Showing posts with label NOT Food Porn. Show all posts
Showing posts with label NOT Food Porn. Show all posts

14.2.09

New Reasons for Living

Hey Snobbers,
So I been semi uninspired of late. And as I'm sure you've noticed haven't posted anything recently. Since I've started this blog, I've encountered a steady stream of supporters/whip-crackers telling me "You need to update your blog" or asking "When are you gonna write something new?"

For anyone who really knows me you know that:

A) I'm lazy

B) This blog is a labour of love...emphasis on labour

and

C) I'll NEVER blog simply for the sake of blogging.

Blogging for the sake of blogging and, for that matter, doing anything without the true motivation or inspiration produces half-assed shit. And I ain't never been about half-assin' it, except, maybe when it comes to sex.... Just kidding.

As a Cultural Critic, I feel that too often people "create" without possessing any real love for what they do. And without love, there is no respect for the craft. Hence, people will stamp their names on any-old shit-in-a-box and keep it moving.

Well there will be none of that here at Critique de Culture, where we blog with integrity and put our heart and souls into each tiny morsel of hate and snobbery.

With that being said here are my new reasons for living:
Reason #1
The good folks at the Museum of Modern Art have bestowed on us lucky Brooklynites reproductions of over 50 pieces of art to be plastered all over the Atlantic Ave/Pacific trainstation.





Check out this adorable excerpt from their mission statment:.

"We know you’re moving at warp speed to get from here to there, but take a
breath and take a look. We hope what you see in the station changes the way you
see the world today, if only for a moment. And it’s a reminder that the real
MoMA is only a short ride away."



How amazing is that?!? Now I get to enjoy the works of Kara Walker, Vincent van Gogh, Jackson Pollack, Picasso, and Roy Lichtenstein while I wait for that 2 train that will never come.

Reason #2
This Why You're Fat.com

Dubbed as the place "Where Dreams Become Heart Attacks", this website features the most gluttonus, artery-clogging, bulemia-inducing delicacies to ever grace the earth.

Feast your eyes upon the Bacon Cheeseburger with Chocolate covered Bacon



Gravy Covered Pizza



or the Spaghetti Meatball on a stick

Strands of cooked spaghetti worked into a meatball, dipped in dough, deep-fried, then topped with marinara sauce

For my Ramen lovers, get into the Romellette, an omlet made with Ramen noodles.


YUMM!!!


Reason #3
The scaffolds are coming down at Topshop!!






Rejoice Retail Whores, the Brits are (finally) coming!!

25.1.09

The Opposite of Food Porn


America takes 20 leaps forward by electing a Biracial president...correction a FINE ASS Biracial President



Then a Greenwich Village Bakery takes 5 steps back with the

DRUNKEN NEGRO FACE COOKIE!!

OMG!! Racists everywhere now have an Official Snack.


I hate that I had to get the video from World Star HipHop.com and FOX 5......two of my sworn enemies. But desperate times call for desperate measures.

Roll the tape....






The damn cookie doesn't even look appetizing....but that Dead Goose bread sure is sexy!!

And how is he gonna say that he has asked Black people if they found the cookie offensive?!?!
Did he ask all Black people?!? I'm sorry, I must've missed that knock on my door (I prolly thought he was a Jehovah's Witness).

After careful and repeated screenings of this video, it is beyond the shadow of a doubt that this man is INSANE. His food handler license needs to be revoked and he needs to hauled off to the loony bin.


PS: Did I mention that hes charging $3.50 for his "work of art"..... Just plain ole' crazy.