I gotta crush on you, I love me some you!!

Yes Snobbers, ya girl is in love!!

I just saw his latest film Elegy, in which he plays British Professor who has an affair with his student, Penelope Cruz, and this crush official.



Ben Kingsley is my 65 year old DILF. (Dad I'd Like to ......well you know)
I was feeling him in The Wackness but I wanted to make sure it wasn't puppy love or the 2 Coconut Margaritas that had before the movie.... But after Elegy, I'm certain he is the ONE!


There is something about older men that just get me going.... their self assuredness(NOTE: not a real word), the fact that they've had numerous lovers ensuring that they know how to romance a woman, or maybe its the fact that his Social Security and Pension are about to kick in... I dunno.
But either way, I'm into him DEEP!

DON'T JUDGE ME!!!

We in 'dere!

TONIGHT....Fo Sho!!!

Colette x GAP

I'm sure you heard about this one by now.
But feel free to file this one under Weirdest collaborations ever...

The boutique of Parisian cool, Colette, is teaming up the the chain of coporate American Lame, The GAP, to produce its first ever mini-shoppe in the US.
The Colette x GAP pop up shop will open for one month(September 6th to October 5th), adjacent to the flagship GAP on 5th ave and 54th street.



Now, I've been to Colette (International Snobette Oui Oui!!)and I've been to the GAP (regretfully so), and I still don't see how these two polar opposite enterprises are gonna mesh well. Hopefully, Colette will have all of the creative control and the GAP will simply foot the bill like a good ole' SugarDaddy!!


Looking homeless outside of Colette.



Lost like a true tourist.

The Pop up store will feature special collaborations by Andre x Neckface, Miss Tic x Claw Money, SO-ME x EPSO and Jean Phillipe Delhomme x Ruben Toledo.
See ColettexGAP.com for more info.

I always wanted to be Dawn....

En Vogue.

The original members: Dawn, Maxine, Terry, Cindy.

I thought it was a cruel joke when i heard that they performed at the BET Awards in June.
So of course I wet my panties with excitement as I watched the YouTube clip.
True talent never fades. My girls still got it!!

God must be really smiling on me

.....Cuz i finally get to see them LIVE!!!
@ B. B. Kings Blues Club.
August 23, 2008

Cop 'em at Ticketmaster

Oh and in case you forgot....

And another one....

Excuse me, while I go change my pants

THIS JUST IN...Common Really Was Badu's Bitch!!

Yess People I said it!!
And Common confirms it in the July issue of Elle Magazine.

Common aka "Sensitive Thug"

ELLE: What’s the worst thing a woman ever said to you?

COMMON: “I don’t want to be with you anymore and I’m really liking this other dude.”

Thats effing cold man... I wish a dude would tell me that...I'd stab his ass, no questions asked!
But wait it gets better, Elle mag quickly narrows it down and uncovers Ms. Badu as the culprit.

ELLE: That pretty much covers the biggies. How long had you been with this particular woman?

COMMON: It started in 2001 and ended in 2003.

ELLE: Oh, so this must have been Erykah Badu. I didn’t know she left you for another guy.

COMMON: It wasn’t all at once. She left me, then eventually she said she liked another guy. It was tough, man. I was heartbroke for months. That was one of the biggest love lessons I ever had.

ELLE: What exactly was the lesson?

COMMON: That no matter how much you love somebody, you’ve got to love yourself first. If you’re truly loving yourself, you won’t allow some things to go down, and you’ll have boundaries. I was so in love that I gave up certain things about me, and that showed a lack of love for myself. It turned out to be such a big blessing that we broke up, because I got that lesson. I actually wrote a children’s book about it called I like You But I Love Me.

Now don't get me wrong ... I LUV me some Common. But Homegirl breaks your heart and you write a children's book?!?! WTF?!?!

But wait theres more......

ELLE: Were there things you did in the relationship you now regret?

COMMON: Planting flowers with her one time. I look back now and go, Man, I really didn’t want to do that.

Its all in the hair man....

Clearly I'm hustling backwards, cuz my "Goodies" don't be having nobody writing Chil'rens books, planting flowers, dressing weird and what not. Obviosuly I need to enroll the Badu School of Pussy Whippin' where the Sky is the Limit to what you punanny can do for you.

Now you know you didn't pick out your outfit...

Here is the link to the entire article on ELLE's Website.
And incase you wanted to secure your copy of Common's Chil'rens Book, Cop that on Amazon where gift wrapping is available.

A Must....

I know it came out like 3 weeks ago....


But I totally loved The Wackness!!
The film was super funny and the soundtrack if effing amazing!!

All joints from 94-95 that totally took me back to my elementary school days in BK

(Biggie, Craig Mack, Total, Wu Tang, Nas and mixtapes when they were actual homemade mixes on real tapes!! Not this digital nonsense we have now. Do you remember making mix tapes off of the radio?!?! ......AAHH the good old Dayz!)
Nostalgia always Culture Approved!



PS: Look our for a cameo by Method Man sporting the worst Jamaican Accent ever in movie history.

Your Daily Dose of Irony

Magazines do not put Black models on covers because we don't sell issues.
In the face of rampant criticism and questions of racism, Italian Vogue does an
"All Black Issue" with 4 different covers of Black models and over 100 pages of editorials featuring black models.
The "Black Issue" hit US newsstands last week.
It sells record breaking numbers in a time when print media is rapidly waning.

I head into the newsstand today shortly after noon. The issue price has gone up a whole $10, from $15.99 to $25.99.

At 9:30pm this evening, I walk back to the same newsstand, the magazine is sold out again.

To this I say 2 things:
Black is the new Black
C.R.E.A.M .........Cash Rules Everything Around Me

"Dolla Dolla Bill y'all!"

C'mon and do the Humpty Hump!!

Come Party the Culture Approved Way!!

Join DJ Lindsey and DJ Myles at their weekly party The Hump at the Blue Owl,
(2nd Ave bet 12 & 13 streets).

Tonight's festivities will be hosted by the lovely Bijules and features Guest DJ Cosmo Baker
of The Rub (Duhh!! Only the most amazing party in all of BK!!)

All this fun for FREE!!
NO COVER... DO YOU HEAR ME BROKE PEOPLE?!?!?
File this one under: WITHIN MY PARTY BUDGET!!

PS: I'm totally LIVING for this flier!! Spike Lee...forever Culture Approved!!
Check out THE HUMP'S flier gallery... OFFICIAL

The Mothership has Landed!!

THE BITCH IS BACK!!!

We in 'dere!

Great Photography.... check!
Open Bar ......check!
Dope gallery space....check!
.....Yeah we'll be there

Don't ya just love gentrification!!!

How lucky are we to have gentrification???
After months of me and my boyfriend complaining that there are no good restaurants in his Bed Stuy hood, look what the gods hath bestowed upon us.....



Peaches Market has just opened it doors for business on the corner of Lewis and Decatur to much hype. I don't know how this one got by me for soo long. The pre-opening was heralded on such websites as Eater, Brownstoner, and Time Out New York.

The restaurant owned by Craig Samuel and Ben Grossman, the duo behind Fort Greene's Lil Pig and The Smoke Joint, will feature American cuisine with a Southern 'twang. With such goodies as Baby Back Ribs, Barbequed French Fries and Cornmeal Crusted Trout, I'm sure the historically African American Bed Stuy will flock to Peaches Market right after their Sunday church services.


But my people lets not forget that Gentrification is a double edged sword. Yes, we get nice new places to eat and what not, but I can hear that rent going through the roof as I type!!
Buy, my people Buy!!! Renting is a trick of the devil. Owning is the only way to keep what we have worked so hard for!!
....With that being said, my reservation for 2 is all set. ...What?!?! Everybody needs to eat!! And Lord knows I can't do Crown Fried Chicken no mo!!!

Peep the Menu

All Types of Wrong!!!

So I been super lazy lately and lacking any real inspiration, but then I saw this picture.
Ladies and Gentlemen The next candidate up for a Slaaaaping is none other than our favorite Custy,


I'm totally speechless. Consider this Scared Straight for the next time someone offers you recreational drugs.....
Drugs are like that dominating boyfriend. They start off as something to do on weekends and next thing you know you been fired from your job for stealing $10.. for the 3rd time, your mama won't return your calls and actually gets that restraining order shes been yapping about for the longest, no wants to hang out with cuz u smell and can't form an intelligible sentence, your cat has moved out.... You get my drift.

NOT A GOOD LOOK AMY!!

Besides.... put that worn-out beat-down tired-ass vadge away.
Scaring people like that. Nobody thinks of crackheads as sexual beings, so stop making our eyes burn and COVER UP!

More like Jacob the Jailer....

If you take a moment to scroll down you'll notice that I've placed mad labels on this post. I guess I'm having a hard time categorizing this foolishness.

(In)Famous jeweler of the Hip Hop Glitterati, Jacob Arabov aka Jacob the Jeweler, was sentenced to 30 months in prison and was slapped with a 2 million dollar fine this week.

"I got that work!!"

The crime?? Laundering Money, to the tune of over $270 million in narcotics earnings for a Detroit-based drug ring. No, that wasn't a typo...I said Detroit Drug Ring Fool!!!

My 2 cents: if hes working with over 270 million, you're only gonna fine him 2 million???
I can't get over the whole drug ring thing (unintentional rhyming, my bad).
I knew his ass was a little to interested in rap music.

Shit, I'm been Black since I was born and truthfully, I'm over rap music.

Source

This Just In.....THE GOLD RUSH IS IN UNDERWAY

According to my sisters over at Around the Way Girls, "Santogold is Everywhere"!

AND WE CONCUR!!!!

Yay for Santi!!!

Culture Snobette is ecstatic for all the love, all the press, and most importantly all the booked tour dates (Act like ya know. Tour dates = $$$$) that our girl Santi has been getting.

And make sure to get there early when Santogold, Diplo, A-trak, and Kid Cudi touch down on Central Park's Annual Summer Stage Concert Series on July 20.

Yes. All that talent, free of charge.
YOU'RE WELCOME

YESSS!!! WERRKK!!!

Any one who even remotely knows me, knows that SS08 for me is all about the Gays.
I've been talking and dancing like a gay, specifically the Banjee ones, so profusely that on numerous occaisons my boyfriend has threatened to drop my flaming ass!!
So when one of my bestest G buddies put me on to Hercules and Love Affair, I ate it up like a 2 piece and a biscuit


Hercules is this amazing ensemble group of singers, musicians and voguers, (yes bitch I said voguers!!)



Their song "Blind" was on my MySpace for the like, forever and sparked many compliments on my "in the know"-ness; which is always a good thing.

Watch it. Eat it. Live it.

Get tour dates, downloads, info and more at Hercules and Love Affair Website.

And shoutout to Shayne and Lacole, le Voguers. WEERRRKKK!!!

And another thing

In unrelated news......
Where was I when this song came out??


And most importantly.....Why do I like it soo much?!?!?

"We Rockin' Stilettos Hoe!! We Rockin' Stilettos Hoe!!"

Pon Di Replay...Literally

Hey Snobbers,
Here at Critique de Culture we honor trendsetters and trailblazers. For example Whitley Gilbert,

Grace Jones,


And the incomparable.....Billy Dee Williams!!

But what we don't tolerate is swagger jackers, d*ck riders, and wannabes.
So I must take this time to shine a light on Little Miss Barbados 1989 aka Pon di Replay aka Rihananna.

While I fully give RiRi props for "chopping her tresses", (ie: taking out her tracks... u really wasn't fooling anybody anyway),

I must demote her a few notches for being in direct violation of swagger jackin'!!
RiRi is clearly suffering with an acute case of Kid Sister-itis.

No!! not that broad...

Rihanna copped the Assymetrical cut the was made famous and ubiquitous my none other than Kelis. Truth be told, I still birds on the B46 bus with the cut, yapping away on their Sidekicks.

Kelis made it cool for sisters to leave the doobie wraps alone for a minute and think outside the box with their hair do's. We must not forget that Kelis's head was about 5 diff'rent colors when she came on the scene back in the late 90's. Miss Thang didn't need nobodie's permission, nor did she need any cosigners and for this she gets a 3 gun salute...Buk! Buk! Buk! (yes, i'm cultured and all, but lets not forget I'm from Flatbush. BK Stand up! )

Roll the Tape....
Here Kelis rocks the Assym look back in 2006.


Then comes Miss RiRi with it, all late in '08.


Now its 2008, Mama Kelis is over the look and, like Denise Huxtable back in the 80's, she moves on to some fly shit that no one else is doing.
Kelis sporting a cropped Mushroom.


And before you know it there goes little Rudy Huxtable trying to keep up....

Snobbers, consider this my open letter Rihanna.
Rihanna, you pay people good money to make sure you look hot, egdy, punk or whateva it is you claim to be now-a-days. Next time they come to you with a pic of someone from 6 months ago, sayin this is your "new" look....Slap them! Cuz they ain't your friend.
Thank you.
Culture Snobette


PS: Oohhhhh... Now I get why her song was called "Pon Di Replay"

Precisely...Don't Get Slapped!!

Calling all Artists, Artists Wannabees and All-round Freaks

Deitch Projects, the renown SoHo gallery, is accepting submissions for their 4th annual Art Parade.


The parade takes place on September 6. The deadline for submissions is July 1st.
Even if you don't submit something, make sure to come check all the naked chicks....

Lessons in Acultural-ism

Now when is it ever appropriate to have your chil'rens looking like this??



I fear for their future... E! True Hollywood Stories here they come!!

Cop This!!

Chances are......



you need to read this and FAST.

David Sedaris, Comedic Genius, Literary Giant

Peep this and tell me you haven't wet your pants....